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Expert discusses

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>> Not a the couples try when good parents

Recent media reports of an artist and husband fight the divorce, both of whom were actively fight for custody of the only child among parents, child folder, lonely eyes distressed people.

Taiwan's divorce rate is the highest in Asia, according to statistics, an average of 177 couples a day, "a blow", a single parent or pseudo-single-parent families (husband and wife separated state) number of families accounted for about three percent of the children in these familiesare faced with the scenario can not live together with their parents, to their psychological emotions of loss and grief, if not properly handled, have a significant impact on children's psychological development.

Scholars believe that grief after the loss, physiological, psychological, underlying cause of the disease, how to help their children through the emotional barriers is an important task of the adults around, the following provides reference:

1.Help him to accept the fact that her parents divorced: articulate parents divorced adult choice, regardless of the child's performance, clearly let the children know that parents fully discussed planning for his future life, guaranteed not to abort his love to increasethe child's sense of security

2.Similarly his emotions: the child may have a variety of emotions, including anger, guilt, anxiety, helplessness, sadness, help children understand these feelings are normal, let him say it or otherwise expressed.

3.Help him adapt to the new life: the appropriate arrangements for the future life of the child may live with one parent, and regular meetings with the other parent, and may wish to consult the child's thinking in making the decision, children also need to face a transfer, moving lifechange as fully informed as possible, in order to facilitate an early psychological preparation.

4.Respect for the child's way: Some children in the event occurred after a period of time after they have emotional, some children will only be some emotional, the adult should accept his condition, patient companionship, take the time to listen to him.

In the process of divorced parents, the child may become timid, especially sticky, depression, previously favorite activities, easily distracted, is also crying, losing her temper, disobedient. Some children are even become good, a very sensible, but at night it will be a nightmare, can not sleep, or bed-wetting. Surrounding adult to be able to accept the child's emotions, do not have to be to blame, but to give More accompanied children to believe that you will protect him.

Children sometimes ask yourself in his heart: "Why me?" Is not my fault? "Is not too bad?" To help the child understand his fear and sad, do not force him to a short period of time waslike a mature adult, but let him express a disguised manner, the results would be even worse.

The kids are prone to sleep problems, and some will be a nightmare, and some will not dare a person to sleep, parents can accompany their children to sleep for a while, and so the children are asleep and then leave, if the child requires, you can sleep with him. If the child is the middle of the night woke up, to accompany him to go to sleep again. Do not worry that this will spoil the kids More attention and appease the child needs.

Parents' marital problems must be parents themselves to face the parents be sure to cooperate in order to reduce the potential damage of the child's fragile mind. When not husband and wife, and still try to be good parents, frank attitude of mutual trust, help children successfully gone through the troubles of the break-up process, and the subsequent growth of time.


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